This was purchased at last year's state fair and lives up to every low standard you'd equate with such a place. It does nothing really, except make loud noises (BYOOObyooobyoooBYOOO), flash red and green lights and irritate everyone who comes into contact with it. It's currently sitting beneath a low end table on top of a Death Star replica and between 2 Storm Trooper masks. What my life has become is a story for another day.
Even now, this, in theory is super rad. A lunchbox that I very well may have owned at one point in my life, complete with random stickers and a Thermos? I'll take three! Unfortunately, at $30 a pop, all I could afford at the time was one and without a daycare to attend, it doesn't get much aside from collecting dust particles. I love Strawberry Shortcake, but this item has put me one stuffed animal away from being the lady with the crocheted tissue box covers...
It's a pen. It's a flower. It's a flower pen. In theory, this was a multi-purpose item: A beautiful bud when not in use and what I hoped would be my new favorite pen. Except that it does a pretty crappy job at being both a reliable writing instrument and a realistic looking flower. Theories are made to be disproved I suppose. Let the flower pen be a lesson to us all.
There was a time that I believed I would wear this hat. That time was last year in NYC...a time I also vaguely recall being at least three glasses of water beyond dehydration. I blame the hallucinations, leading me to practically freebase cheesecake squares on the street and believe I might be the governor of Alaska someday. Thank god I won it in a bet about the exact location of Guitar Center. But what kind of a price can you really put on dignity?
I know. Adorable right? Those googly cross eyes. That tiny green horn, mohawk thing. The furry orange eye brows. Love him. But this doesn't change the fact that this is a hand puppet, folks, and I have neither children nor a job requiring ventriloquism as a skill. "Hammond" has been reduced to decorating a mic stand for the time being.
